Adventures into the unknown...

I have heard Malta is a beautiful place... or so I have heard. My journey to this country did not allow much time for visits or exploration. Instead, I went to Malta after finding out my mother was rushed to hospital and required emergency surgery for a bowel obstruction.

Immediately I reached out to my circle of friends, and they further reached out to theirs... and within hours (literally), i was connected with individuals that would become my angels on earth for over two weeks as i left my husband and children to be with my mother.

The departure from Bogota was extremely difficult as I prepared myself for the unknown. We immersed ourselves into celebrating each moment as a family and enjoying the magic of each other. As soon as I moved into the elevator i was flooded with tears that would not stop... and that did not stop, and that in some ways perhaps may never stop. The moment was life changing as my life seemed to uproot before my eyes. yet the path was clear, i needed to be with my mother and that is where I was going to be.

Thanks to the help of dear friends i found a very good connection via Frankfurt and managed to arrive in Malta within two days of travel. I arrived in the middle of the night and was greeted by a lovely taxi driver who took me to a hotel. The night manager was waiting for me and led me to my room... which was prepared with truffles and wine (not that i could even contemplate drinking, but what a lovely gesture). These acts of kindness were those of the CEO of the hotel who reached out to embrace me into his community during this difficult time. The following morning he set time aside to introduce me to my first 'friends' in malta: Dorien and Kirsty. They took me to the hospital where i was able to see my mom. From that moment on I was with my mom as she worked on her recovery from the surgery. It had been a major surgery with some complications, but everything seemed to finish successfully.

The time in Malta was riddled with adventures that I hope to have time to fully describe and write about in the future. Above all, it was a time riddled with emotional extremes as I processed being in an unknown place, away from my home, my husband, my children... yet near my mother sharing beautiful moments, while at the same time watching her struggle to regain her strength and accept new challenges her body was presenting with.

About a week in, we learned that my mom was diagnosed with cancer of the colon. The diagnosis seemed unclear at this point and we were full of hope that the surgical procedure had removed the cancer. The coming days proved more hazy as the oncology reports came in indicating aggressive cancer cells and possible metastasis into the lymphatic system. Though we remained optimistic and my mother was determined that the 'name' of this disease would not claim her spirit.

We talked, we laughed, we shared... i cried... missing my kids, missing Joshua, trying to grasp how i found myself so many miles from my home. My time was also riddled with bureaucratic details from dealing with the hospital care, to insurance drama (have you heard of 'pre-existing conditions'... well, since my mom was diagnosed with cancer, the company is leaning on 'pre-existing symptoms'... a very painful process having to deal with the drama of feeling as if the job of the insurance company was NOT to help bring my mom back to Canada, but instead to figure out how NOT to pay the claim). As well as still dealing with legal issues related to the dear Mr. JW. Oh the joys of all these matters at a time when none of them seem to matter at all?!?

Through it all, I felt incredibly 'held and protected' by a community of 'strangers' that became instant fixtures in my heart. The blessing of these individuals is the gift that I take away from this adventure. A gift that will be for my lifetime. the 'strangers' invited me to their homes, fed me, listened to me, supported me, and helped me navigate unknown territories with incredible guidance and clarity. They truly were my angels on earth at a time when i needed to be carried.

The view from my mom's room at St. James Hospital

Munia looking out at the ocean... sharing time together was precious to me

The view from the hospital hallway

A double rainbow (full from end to end)
appeared in my mom's hospital room window
the day before we began our trip back to Canada.

I was taking this photo through a window and
could not quite capture the entire rainbow end to end...
but you get a good idea of how spectacular it was.

In the end, I had to coordinate the departure from Malta myself as the Insurance company refused to pay the claim due to 'pre-existing symptoms'. Just imagine, on top of getting the diagnosis of cancer, you also get a medical bill that is beyond comprehension. The fact that her family physician encouraged her to go on vacation claiming her symptoms were due to stress did not seem to influence the situation.

Though i suppose it is not important how things sort out, what is important is that we go home.

My deepest gratitude to all the 'angels' who have helped me on this path... you have entered my life at a moment when i did not even know where to turn, and embraced me without hesitation or reservation. I cannot even begin to express the extent of my thanks.

Anaïs is three!!!

This year Anaïs turned three on February 10th. We had been planning a very exciting birthday celebration with a few close friends (all guests selected by Anaïs herself)... and the guest list included first and foremost (well following her sister, her brother and mom and dad) none other than Minnie Mouse. A few surprising turns in our life meant we had to cancel the official birthday party (for which we were planning to have my mom here). However, as I would have to be leaving for an unknown length of time on the evening of Anaïs's birthday, we still wanted to make sure that we made the celebration extra special for our birthday girl. So we arranged for a few special surprises... after all, a girl only turns three once!!!

check out how she is holding her right hand with the three fingers ready...

The first was a trampoline

which both Leo and Anaïs starting jumping on together.

This is Anaïs hiding in her sisters arms as she waits for surprise #2.

Isabel was not even momentarily shy as Minnie Mouse entered the house.

The girls took Minnie for a tour around the house
and then they all danced (though first minnie did her special dance)

Our gorgeous three year old!!!

my girls!!!

Three years ago this little monkey came into the world right on time (five minutes after papa walked in the door after a very stressful flight back to Bogotá from Medellin). Today she turns three and continues to be pure sunshine (with fewer and fewer bouts of thunder). She has a personality to be reckoned with... and can charm her way to eating many cookies a day... her first word in both english and spanish, and continues to be her favourite treat. She talks and holds herself with tremendous confidence and inspires magic all around her. Happy Birthday Anaïs!!! Keep growing into the phenomenal human being that you are.

Christmas Holidays in Canada

We spent a magical couple weeks in Canada... playing in the snow, enjoying the cold and sharing time with friends. Isabel went skiing for the first time and all the kids enjoyed eating snow. Christmas with Nana and Jid'do was over the top with gifts and delicious food. Followed by a quieter week with Budi in Toronto. It was busy and full, with little time for photography. But here is a little peek into some of our memories.

Isabel's first ski!!!
She went down the big hill three times
after one morning of practice on the bunny slope.

Leo all bundled up

family time

christmas morning

Leo with great grandma edna

leo climbing stairs

eating snow... anaïs and julia

isabel and sofia

ela

leo and domenic

alissandra and leo

Leo turns ONE

Enjoying his chocolate ice cream!

From now on, each year with winter solstice will also come the celebration of Leo's entrance into our world... it's quite a remarkable correlation and an 'exciting' birth story. Since his birthday also falls very close to Christmas, an event we celebrate with abundance in our home, I am committed to ensuring that he always feels that we mark the special moment that is his birthday during this often very busy time of year. So, despite preparing for our family vacation to Canada and the busy-ness of work (currently photography and yoga) this time of year, we still decided to plan a little party in Leo's name just before we left... being that his birth was in Colombia, it seemed appropriate to mark his 1st birthday cheer here also. We tried to keep it small (which is always hard for me) in part because we did not want to overwhelm Leo (and the girls), and in part because both girls, Leo and I all got sick for the two weeks prior to our departure. Never a dull moment...

We managed to bring together a small circle of cherished friends to honour our little man with their presence. I baked a zucchini cake (two, in fact... you will read why) with no icing (i know, i'm so boring). I made some food (sadly no photo of the spread... i always forget that). The kids ran around our apartment and the adults got to share some 'interrupted' conversations, yummy dips & things, and steaming mulled wine (yummy... my first batch and i loved it... i think it cured my cold). For the cake we all sang (in English, in Spanish, and of course in Polish too) as Leo sat proudly in his high chair, blew out his candle (with a little help from his big sisters) and then got to have one of the cakes all too himself. I had to reassure the shocked faces looking at me that there was another cake to share with all the guests... this one was just for Leo.

As each guest left we shared a blue crystal that they could hang in their windows to bring light into their homes and in doing so to let the light of our world grow more brightly for the future (and present moment) of all our children. All in all, it was a lovely afternoon... and very low-key for Colombia, so much so that I actually had one of the young guests (she is four) ask me when the party was starting (meaning: when are the animators coming to make animal balloons, where is the jumpy house, when is the puppet show, when does the face-painting start... birthday parties in South America are huge). Though by the end she too was having a great time and most of the kids did not want to leave as they were having so much fun.

Of course, we also marked Leo's actual birthday on December 22nd in Morin Heights, QC, Canada... in the home that Joshua celebrated his first birthday. This second event was even quieter bringing together two of Joshua's brothers, Joshua's parents, and a dear family friend, Rhonda, to share some cake (gingerbread baked by Mallory... delicious).

Make a wish Leo

Sadly, Leo himself was not in the happiest state of mind. We had just flown in the night before... it was the first time Leo was experiencing snow, cold, and his first flight ever to boot!! The flight went well, other than the landing in Montreal where the plane decompressed too quickly and Leo got massive pressure in his ears... we actually feared an ear infection, but were happily helped by a local (and truly gifted!!!) Osteopath who was able to help release the pressure and bring our happy guy back to his normal, happy, easy-going self. And from here, our adventures in Canada began... but I'll save that update for the next post.

Big Sister Anaïs 

Big Sister Isabel

A very unhappy Leo... so rare, i had to post!

A much happier Leo opening his birthday presents from Nana the next morning... sweet, sweet bunny hugs

Catching raindrops...

Catching raindrops

Today we enjoyed our 3rd Annual Kramer Marshmallow Roast and Crafts morning. It was the Day of the Immaculate Conception, and so a national holiday here in Colombia. However, the embassy does not follow the Colombian holiday schedule (too bad, as there are about 25 Colombian holidays throughout the year!!), and so I was solo with the three kids. Thankfully, there were lots of helping hands, and we all managed to have a great time.
The weather was, well, typical for Colombia... some sun, some rain, and a lot of unpredictability. Despite the clouds and sprinkles from the sky, the roast and crafts went on. Isabel and Anaïs made beautiful pine cones sprinkled with glitter for our tree, and roasted marshmallows to make s'mores (two graham crackers filled with chocolate and roasted, melting marshmallow). Isabel devoured hers, and then quickly ate Anaïs's, after Anaïs decided that the roasted marshmallow leaking out from the cracker was just too messy (wonder where she gets that from?!?).
Rather than hiding from the rain, the kids and I decided to enjoy the sprinkles from above singing one of our favourite tunes...

If all of the raindrops were jelly beans and gumdrops, oh what a rain that would be. I'd go stand outside with my mouth open wide singing "ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah..."

Sure beats 'rain rain go away' when you are living in rainy season here in Bogotá. A dear friend caught a photo... and since it's a rare one of me in front of the camera (rather than behind it taking pictures of everyone else) I wanted to share!!

 

Día de las Velitas

Our five little candles... the first to light up in the early evening!!!!!

The Day of the Little Candles is officially celebrated on the eve of the Day of the Immaculate Conception (December 8th). It is one of the most observed traditional holidays here in Colombia. As the sun goes down on December 7th, people place candles and paper lanterns on their windows, balconies, porches, sidewalks, parks and local squares. We took a walk down to the square next to Hacienda Santa Barbara to light five candles... one for each member of our little family. As we lit each candle, each of us set an intention for something positive on earth... in our home, in our world.

Traditionally, the candles are lit to honour the Virgin Mary and in particular her immaculate conception of Jesus Christ. As some of you might know, Colombia is extremely religious, and dominantly Catholic. The celebration of the Day of the Candles dates back to December 8, 1854 when Pope Pius IX published a constitution that marked the Immaculate Conception as dogma in the Catholic faith. In anticipation of this announcement, people showed their support and faith by lighting candles and paper lanterns.

Colombia is one of the few places in the world that continues to observe this tradition. And while the customs vary slightly in different parts of the country, it is a very big deal all over the country
In Bogotá, this is the day that begins the full expression of Christmas decorations and families make plans to walk the streets all over the city to enjoy the beautiful lights and light their own candles. On the coast, the lighting of the candles and lanterns takes place in the early hours of December 8th, just before sunrise, instead of the night before. In Cali, the Cali River is illuminated for the season and people walk in almost a pilgrimage along the river. All over the country, this day brings families together to celebrate with food, drinks and lights.

One of the most interesting things about celebrating the festival of lights here, is that it has afforded me the opportunity to learn more about the day of the immaculate conception. I had always been under the false impression that December 8th marked the day of the 'actual immaculate conceptuon'. Meanwhile, it simply marks the day it became dogma in the eyes of the church. Certainly makes much more sense than a 3-week pregnancy!!!

Breath of Joy: Energize, Uplift and Cleanse

You give me joy, joy, joy, joy, joy!

There is something magical about December 1st. Somehow it is the start of a new season, a turning of the page, a permission to immerse head first into the spirit of the season. Whether celebrating Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, Light... there is a magic to this time of year that cannot be denied. I see it in the eyes of my children... they are full of excitement, and there doesn't even seem to be a reason for the excitement, it is just there. As I embrace the joy, there is only one pose that I can think of to inspire even more joy, as well as to help put to rest any 'stress of the season' that might sneak up from behind. The breath of joy is a fantastic yoga breathing exercise (pranayama) that has the power to energize, uplift and cleanse mind, body and soul. It uses rhythmic body motion (coordinating arm movements with your breath) to facilitate deeper, fuller breathing. The motion in the arms helps to fill all areas of the lungs (lower, middle and upper) with fresh oxygen and charges the entire with energy.

It is undoubtedly one of my favourite 'poses'/breathing exercises. It is also one you can do anytime, and I was hazard to say anywhere (so long as you can find a little space of your own away from all the action). I still remember (in my past life when I worked crazy hours and spent my days immersed in the corporate world of strategic planning and organizational restructuring) sneaking into my office, closing the door and taking a pause with a few breaths of joy... the effect was amazing. No matter what was waiting for me on the other side of the door, I was renewed with energy and courage.

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... It is about learning to dance in the rain!" ~ Anonymous

Taking position...
Stand with your feet hip width apart with a gentle bend in your knees. The inhalation is done in three parts, followed by a strong hara breath exhalation. Each part of the inhale corresponds to a movement of the arms. Make sure that it is one inhalation and try to avoid inserting a small exhale at the end of each part of the inhale.
Inhale through the nose and gently swing your arms up in front of you to shoulder height (parallel to the floor). Continue to the second part of the inhalation while swinging the arms open to the sides, opening in your heart center (making a T-formation). Feel your shoulder blades come together in the back as your chest opens in the front. On the third inhalation, swing your arms up overhead, fingers to the sky.
As you exhale, swing the arms towards the ground allowing your torso to fold forward as you let out a 'HA' sound.
Start of slowly to find a rhythm that is appropriate for you.
The breath is: in, in, in, out.
The corresponding arm movements are: front, side, up, down.
Repeat five to eleven times. At the end of the final exhalation, allow your upper body to hang down in rag doll... releasing and observing the effect of this breathing technique. When you are ready, slowly begin to roll up. Try to take a few full breaths to come up to standing stacking one vertabra on top of the other. Roll your shoulders back, bring your gaze forward and either: get ready to face the next moment in your day, or continue with some light stretching (e.g. half-moon stretches lifting your arms up and extending to the side).

Benefits...
The use of the arms with the inhalation encourages deep and full breathing infusing the body with fresh oxygen. The first inhalation (arms forward) encourages breathing into the diaphragm. The second inhalation (arms to the sides) encourages thoracic breathing. The third inhalation (arms up) encourages clavicular breathing. Then the deep and complete exhale at the end helps to detoxify the body (via the respiratory system) and get rid of any stale air that builds up in the lungs.
The pose naturally energizes the entire body, strengthens the arms and shoulders and it will, no doubt, make you smile!!

Taking care...
There are not too many reasons to hold you back from doing this pose, but I will note a few precautions for your personal awareness. Since the head falls below the heart for the exhale, you may feel lightheaded. This is not a major concern. Just take a moment to relax and find your natural breath again. If you need to, come down to the floor and relax in child's pose. However, if you have low blood pressure, practice slowly and go less deeply into the bend on the final exhalation. The one caution I will suggest is that this breathing technique is not recommended for anyone with untreated high blood pressure or injuries of the head (including severe migraines or glaucoma). It is important to keep your knees bent to protect your lower back against the slight bounce as you move through this rapid and dynamic breath. If you have lower back issues, go at a slower, gentler pace. As always, listen to your body and go only to your own personal edge.

This is one of my favourite yoga exercises as it encourages better breathing, engages the entire body, and always leaves me feeling lighter. With the holiday season, this is also a great breathing technique to release anxiety... take a moment to escape and return with less stress and ready to have fun. It's also one of the most fun exercises to do with the kids... as they are eager to move around and have no inhibitions being loud (even in yoga class, which really does not always have to be quiet). Whenever we do this pose at home we usually end up laughing on the floor (now that's reason to celebrate)!
Have fun, let go of your inhibitions and enjoy the smile on your face (not to mention the stretch for your body).

Have fun creating joy... from the inside out!!!!! There is incredible power in simply carving out a little space in your life for moments of joy.