state of mind

Last night Isabel woke up at night with a high fever. Joshua and I found immense patience within ourselves as we moved through the night barely sleeping, and entered into the day barely awake. There was no doubt, no confusion. Isabel was sick and we needed to just do whatever had to be done in that moment... for her, for each other, for ourselves, and for Anaïs. And we did... and despite being sick and tired Isabel was kind and cooperative. It gave me pause as to why the times when our patience wanes in the day to day expectations about sleep, eating, schedules and so on. I was struck by the fact that when we knew without a doubt the reason for a certain behaviour, a positive response was simple and clear. Yet, when the wake ups don't make sense... or at least we cannot identify a clear reason for what is causing a certain reaction; our own response become harder to justify... not only to others, but to ourselves. Our patience gets worn and we just want things to make sense. And yet, the sense is not always clear in the moment. But what is clear to me is that there is a reason to respect the other person, the other child, the other spirit... their expression is real and justifiable; even if it does not make perfect sense to us. Our frustration does not find its roots in this moment; rather, it comes from our own ideas about ourselves and our world. Our expectations, our fears, our doubts. And so, in this moment, I found myself putting forth a challenge to me... to remember my state of mind when I could understand the cause, especially in those moments when I could not. For it does not matter what the reason... it simply is what it is; and it always, always passes. May I find "the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference"... and above all, the strength to trust that everything is exactly as it is meant to be.