livin' it... as it comes

Parenting is an adventure. Honestly, if someone had told me how deep I would need to dig for patience; how often I would question my choices; how completely undone my foundation would become (only to grow new roots all over again); how completely exhausted I would be... and how much I would love despite it all, or perhaps because of it. Well, if someone had told me how hard parenting really is when I was pregnant with Isabel... I honestly would not have believed it.
There are so many moments in every single day that make me question whether I am really cut out for this job. Whether I can give each one of my children the care and unique environment they require to flourish, to be happy, to be exactly who they want to be... the best that they can be. On days when I am especially tired and worn out, I can so easily find myself slip off the path... the tension and insecurities bubbling up inside of me; the doubts about whether I can be enough (whatever that really means). More often than not, it is ME who needs the time out. A moment to step away, take a few breaths and engage anew in the reality that is before me.
So, while I muddle through the challenges and push myself to grow in ways that I never expected... I savour the moments that make my heart sing: the interactions between my kids, the capacity they have to love (each other and the world around them), their ability to laugh (and make the world laugh with them), their ability to be, their ability to see everything so clearly, so simply...

These are the moments that I cherish. These are the moments that give me strength to get through all the other ones...

Isabel and Anaïs and Leo never cease to amaze me in their curiosity and enthusiasm. In the way they can adore each other... not all the time, but oh so very often. I burst with gratitude, love and excitement. Below, a couple moments to cherish and remember... for this week.

Isabel & Anaïs enjoying a little 'sister' (aka partner) yoga. They end up teaching me more than I do them as we go through the routines and they make up their own creative poses... always with good deep breathing, a lot of laughter, and a good dose of flexibility training.

Like every two year old, Anaïs has her moments... but the enthusiasm with which she embraces her little brother is completely disarming. Here she was telling him secrets and singing songs... loving it that he was reaching out to hold her hand.